Cosmic Wrestling TV #2
LIVE from London, England. Thursday 28th February 2019.
< Cosmic Wrestling TV #1
Start from the beginning with the Creation PPV
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the second ever episode of Cosmic Wrestling TV. My name is Dorian Hindman, and joining me in the commentary booth, Manny Fantana."
"Heine, we have come to the land of Kings and Queens to see the one and only King Wonderful defeat the phony champion, Tommy Gates." Fantana is comfortably in to his fifties, but is still a gigantic specimen of a human. His muscular physique is made ridiculous by his wardrobe, which seems to exclusively feature garish suits. Dorian, by comparison, looks like the world's most average man with his clean cut appearance and bland attire.
"We are indeed coming live from the National Opera House in London, England. A beautiful building in which to watch some wrestling. And we will indeed be seeing King Wonderful taking on the champ later tonight."
"He'll do more than take him on, Heine, he'll beat him with ease!"
"Well, we'll find out more about that in the main event. First, though, we'll be seeing the first ever Cosmic Dragon, Flash, in action. Last week, in a sit down interview, he said that he would face all comers in the dragon division until someone manages to beat him. Whoever that man is will receive the first title shot for the Cosmic Dragon Championship."
"It should have been Cashman, Heine." Fantana is close to sulking.
"How do you figure that? He lost clean last week."
"He lost last week but, given another chance, he'd whoop Flash all over the ring."
Dorian considers arguing, but decides against it. "Well, tonight, we will see the champion face Psicosis Junior. Cashman had the opportunity last week and failed, will the second generation luchador fare any better? Let's go to the ring and find out."
"That was looking to be a fantastic match-up. How dare Mohammed Cashman ruin it!"
"He was proving a point, Heine!" Fantana argues.
"Well, I'm hearing that we can ask the man himself. Walt Frederick has caught up with the arrogant sportsman backstage."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt says hurriedly, his moustache disheveled and his breath short from running to catch Mo. "Can you answer for your actions, just now?" He thrusts the microphone in to Cashman's face, who smiles.
"I was taking out my competition, Walter." He chuckles at his own genius. "If I interfere, nobody can beat Flash and then I'll get the shot."
"But," Walt looks apprehensive "by attacking Psicosis, you disqualified Flash. Therefore, Psicosis is now in line for the first ever Cosmic Dragon title shot."
The smile drops from Mo Cashman's face, replaced first by confusion, then anger. He storms off and Walt struggles to refrain from laughing.
Dorian is beside himself, almost howling with laughter. Fantana is fuming.
"I'll need to have words with management around here, Heine. Since when can champions decide who becomes their next challenger?"
Dorian eventually recovers and responds, huge smile on his face. "Champions have always been encouraged to fight whenever they can, Manny. Besides, Psicosis defeated the champion!"
"It's not like he pinned him!"
Dorian starts laughing again and manages to throw to a pre-taped interview with Diamond TA. "Now, it's time to see what Diamond TA had to say after his match last week."
We cut to Diamond TA stood in a car park, loading gear in to a Range Rover. He sees the camera coming towards him and addresses it. "You all saw what happened out there tonight. Suzuki was the number one contender, and I tapped him out clean. That makes me the next in line for a shot at Gates. Not Reaper, not Suzuki, me!" With that, he throws the last of his bags in the car. The camera pans left and we see Suzuki loading his car, fifty or so yards away. Diamond follows where the camera looked and grins mischievously.
He closes his boot slowly, silently, and creeps as close as he can before Suzuki notices him. The camera crew follows, the noise they make is what alerts Suzuki to the danger. Too late, though, Diamond TA sprints at him, forcing the Japanese giant in to his own boot, smashing the back of his head. Diamond slams it shut and laughs to himself as he retreats to his car and drives away. The camera crew rescue Suzuki and he chases them away, looking angry and ashamed.
When we return to the commentators, their mood has flipped upside down. Fantana is the one laughing, and Hindman is furious.
"That was a crime! We literally just watched a crime take place!" Dorian fumes but Fantana just laughs. "It's time for Mad Dog Silva versus Hubert Robert Armstrong. Would you stop!"
We cut to the ring as Fantana continues dying of laughter.
"The hometown man, Armstrong, had has fair share of that match, but the Scotsman proved too much." Dorian turns to his colleague for input.
"Hubert did well to work his way towards hitting the Chelsea Grimace, named after a place not far from here, but once Mad Dog blocked his attempt, the writing was on the wall."
"Once the action spilled outside the ring and Mad Dog was slamming Armstrong in to the railings, the referee had no choice. So, does this answer the number one contender question?"
"Mad Dog Silva held the KO title since it was introduced almost a year ago! He deserves a rematch after failing at his fifteenth defence."
"I agree, and, I hear in my earpiece, so does management. Ladies and gentlemen, I can officially announce the first confirmed match for Evolution next month. We will see Isiah Jones defend the Knock Out Championship against Mad Dog Silva. Thoughts, Fantana?"
"Sounds like an instant classic, Heine. The undefeated, unproven rookie one on one with the unchained animal of Cosmic Wrestling."
"Fantastic." Hindman beams. "Tommy Gates, the first ever Cosmic Wrestling champion, will be in a non-title match later tonight with King Wonderful. Walt Frederick is backstage with him now."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt smiles. "Tommy, let us know your thoughts on the current state of the Cosmic heavyweight division. You have four men all gunning for your title."
"As I should, Walt. This belt," he holds the title up to the camera, "is the pinnacle of wrestling today. Everyone should be aiming to hold it, everyone should want to beat me. The King gets his chance tonight to prove himself. Reaper, Suzuki, and TA have all shown they're worthy as well. Honestly, Walt, I'm going to let management decide who faces me. If King beats me tonight, perhaps it should be him? Who can say? Isiah Jones is undefeated and a champion. Perhaps a champion versus champion match?"
"Isiah Jones has just been announced as defending against Mad Dog Silva at Evolution."
"They've announced that? That'll be a great match, as their first one was. Have management said anything about me and the Cosmic title?"
"Nothing yet." Walt shakes his head.
"Okay," Gates nods, "then all I can do is keep fighting and winning until they tell me who I'm facing."
"Tommy Gates, thank you." Walt turns to the camera. "Now to the ring for one half of the Duos champions in singles action."
"For the second week in a row, Heine, The Seventh Circle is showing dominance." Fantana is beaming, proud.
"That certainly was an impressive victory from Skull Seven."
"He would have had it won sooner, too, Heine, if not for AWESOME sticking his nose in where it doesn't belong."
"MAX fought the best match he could, but he couldn't lift Skull in to his finishing maneouver, The Last Breath. AWESOME did what he could to keep his partner in the game, but it wasn't enough."
"You're covering for them again!" Manny shouts. "The retain by count out at the pay per view, and now they've lost for two straight weeks despite more cheating! These kids will get what's coming to them, Heine. These kids will lose their belts, real soon!"
"I can now confirm, Fantana, the Cosmic Duos titles will be on the line in two weeks time, at Evolution. MAX AWESOME defending against The Seventh Circle's War and Skull Seven."
"Turns out real soon will be a week on Saturday, Heine, at Evolution."
"Ladies and gentlemen, the next match you will see will be the main event of the evening, pitching King Awesome against the Cosmic Champion, Tommy Gates. Before we go to the ring, Walt Frederick is backstage."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt is stood, seemingly alone, in a very clean corner of a locker room. Almost like it is a mock-up rather than an actual changing room for wrestlers. "Joining me at this time, the undefeated, new KO champion, Isiah Jones." The camera zooms out to show the girthy Jamaican stood confidently with his belt slung over his left shoulder. "Isiah, congratulations on becoming only the second ever KO champion. What is your reaction to the news that Mad Dog Silva will get a rematch against you at Evolution?"
"Walt, first of all, thank you for your kind words." Isiah's voice is rich and deep. Were he to read a bedtime story, you'd fall in to a peaceful sleep within moments. "As for Mad Dog, well, he's in for another beating next month, just like last-"
From nowhere, Mad Dog Silva enters from screen right, attacking and brutally mauling Isiah Jones, knocking him to the floor and stomping on his head. He is eventually dragged away by security, and Isiah Jones is unmoving on the floor.
"What did we just see, Fantana?" Dorian is in shock.
"I can't condone that, Heine." Fantana shakes his head. "Attacking a man from behind while he is distracted is not something we do here in Cosmic Wrestling."
"With any luck or justice, they'll strip him of his title shot at Evolution."
"Perhaps they should, Heine. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if Jones demands the match take place, after what we just saw. He might want to knock Silva out for good."
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, I can only apologise for the unnecessary level of violence you just saw, and take you instead to what is sure to be an excellent main event."
"Tommy Gates!" Dorian is a fanboy. A middle aged, should-be-professional, fanboy.
"He must be cheating, somehow!" Fantana is incredulous.
"Reaper interferes and hits a Burning Hammer, Gates kicks out. King hits him with The Crown from the second rope, Gates kicks out. King hits the Pumphandle Gourdbuster, Gates kicks out. King hits the Crown, in to the Gourdbuster, Gates kicks out!"
"I don't know how, Heine, but he's cheating somehow."
"I think he's just that damn good. He is the Cosmic Champion, and could be for some time to come. Thank you all for joining us. From myself and Manny Fantana, see you next week!"
Next episode >
< Cosmic Wrestling TV #1
Start from the beginning with the Creation PPV
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the second ever episode of Cosmic Wrestling TV. My name is Dorian Hindman, and joining me in the commentary booth, Manny Fantana."
"Heine, we have come to the land of Kings and Queens to see the one and only King Wonderful defeat the phony champion, Tommy Gates." Fantana is comfortably in to his fifties, but is still a gigantic specimen of a human. His muscular physique is made ridiculous by his wardrobe, which seems to exclusively feature garish suits. Dorian, by comparison, looks like the world's most average man with his clean cut appearance and bland attire.
"We are indeed coming live from the National Opera House in London, England. A beautiful building in which to watch some wrestling. And we will indeed be seeing King Wonderful taking on the champ later tonight."
"He'll do more than take him on, Heine, he'll beat him with ease!"
"Well, we'll find out more about that in the main event. First, though, we'll be seeing the first ever Cosmic Dragon, Flash, in action. Last week, in a sit down interview, he said that he would face all comers in the dragon division until someone manages to beat him. Whoever that man is will receive the first title shot for the Cosmic Dragon Championship."
"It should have been Cashman, Heine." Fantana is close to sulking.
"How do you figure that? He lost clean last week."
"He lost last week but, given another chance, he'd whoop Flash all over the ring."
Dorian considers arguing, but decides against it. "Well, tonight, we will see the champion face Psicosis Junior. Cashman had the opportunity last week and failed, will the second generation luchador fare any better? Let's go to the ring and find out."
"That was looking to be a fantastic match-up. How dare Mohammed Cashman ruin it!"
"He was proving a point, Heine!" Fantana argues.
"Well, I'm hearing that we can ask the man himself. Walt Frederick has caught up with the arrogant sportsman backstage."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt says hurriedly, his moustache disheveled and his breath short from running to catch Mo. "Can you answer for your actions, just now?" He thrusts the microphone in to Cashman's face, who smiles.
"I was taking out my competition, Walter." He chuckles at his own genius. "If I interfere, nobody can beat Flash and then I'll get the shot."
"But," Walt looks apprehensive "by attacking Psicosis, you disqualified Flash. Therefore, Psicosis is now in line for the first ever Cosmic Dragon title shot."
The smile drops from Mo Cashman's face, replaced first by confusion, then anger. He storms off and Walt struggles to refrain from laughing.
Dorian is beside himself, almost howling with laughter. Fantana is fuming.
"I'll need to have words with management around here, Heine. Since when can champions decide who becomes their next challenger?"
Dorian eventually recovers and responds, huge smile on his face. "Champions have always been encouraged to fight whenever they can, Manny. Besides, Psicosis defeated the champion!"
"It's not like he pinned him!"
Dorian starts laughing again and manages to throw to a pre-taped interview with Diamond TA. "Now, it's time to see what Diamond TA had to say after his match last week."
We cut to Diamond TA stood in a car park, loading gear in to a Range Rover. He sees the camera coming towards him and addresses it. "You all saw what happened out there tonight. Suzuki was the number one contender, and I tapped him out clean. That makes me the next in line for a shot at Gates. Not Reaper, not Suzuki, me!" With that, he throws the last of his bags in the car. The camera pans left and we see Suzuki loading his car, fifty or so yards away. Diamond follows where the camera looked and grins mischievously.
He closes his boot slowly, silently, and creeps as close as he can before Suzuki notices him. The camera crew follows, the noise they make is what alerts Suzuki to the danger. Too late, though, Diamond TA sprints at him, forcing the Japanese giant in to his own boot, smashing the back of his head. Diamond slams it shut and laughs to himself as he retreats to his car and drives away. The camera crew rescue Suzuki and he chases them away, looking angry and ashamed.
When we return to the commentators, their mood has flipped upside down. Fantana is the one laughing, and Hindman is furious.
"That was a crime! We literally just watched a crime take place!" Dorian fumes but Fantana just laughs. "It's time for Mad Dog Silva versus Hubert Robert Armstrong. Would you stop!"
We cut to the ring as Fantana continues dying of laughter.
"The hometown man, Armstrong, had has fair share of that match, but the Scotsman proved too much." Dorian turns to his colleague for input.
"Hubert did well to work his way towards hitting the Chelsea Grimace, named after a place not far from here, but once Mad Dog blocked his attempt, the writing was on the wall."
"Once the action spilled outside the ring and Mad Dog was slamming Armstrong in to the railings, the referee had no choice. So, does this answer the number one contender question?"
"Mad Dog Silva held the KO title since it was introduced almost a year ago! He deserves a rematch after failing at his fifteenth defence."
"I agree, and, I hear in my earpiece, so does management. Ladies and gentlemen, I can officially announce the first confirmed match for Evolution next month. We will see Isiah Jones defend the Knock Out Championship against Mad Dog Silva. Thoughts, Fantana?"
"Sounds like an instant classic, Heine. The undefeated, unproven rookie one on one with the unchained animal of Cosmic Wrestling."
"Fantastic." Hindman beams. "Tommy Gates, the first ever Cosmic Wrestling champion, will be in a non-title match later tonight with King Wonderful. Walt Frederick is backstage with him now."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt smiles. "Tommy, let us know your thoughts on the current state of the Cosmic heavyweight division. You have four men all gunning for your title."
"As I should, Walt. This belt," he holds the title up to the camera, "is the pinnacle of wrestling today. Everyone should be aiming to hold it, everyone should want to beat me. The King gets his chance tonight to prove himself. Reaper, Suzuki, and TA have all shown they're worthy as well. Honestly, Walt, I'm going to let management decide who faces me. If King beats me tonight, perhaps it should be him? Who can say? Isiah Jones is undefeated and a champion. Perhaps a champion versus champion match?"
"Isiah Jones has just been announced as defending against Mad Dog Silva at Evolution."
"They've announced that? That'll be a great match, as their first one was. Have management said anything about me and the Cosmic title?"
"Nothing yet." Walt shakes his head.
"Okay," Gates nods, "then all I can do is keep fighting and winning until they tell me who I'm facing."
"Tommy Gates, thank you." Walt turns to the camera. "Now to the ring for one half of the Duos champions in singles action."
"For the second week in a row, Heine, The Seventh Circle is showing dominance." Fantana is beaming, proud.
"That certainly was an impressive victory from Skull Seven."
"He would have had it won sooner, too, Heine, if not for AWESOME sticking his nose in where it doesn't belong."
"MAX fought the best match he could, but he couldn't lift Skull in to his finishing maneouver, The Last Breath. AWESOME did what he could to keep his partner in the game, but it wasn't enough."
"You're covering for them again!" Manny shouts. "The retain by count out at the pay per view, and now they've lost for two straight weeks despite more cheating! These kids will get what's coming to them, Heine. These kids will lose their belts, real soon!"
"I can now confirm, Fantana, the Cosmic Duos titles will be on the line in two weeks time, at Evolution. MAX AWESOME defending against The Seventh Circle's War and Skull Seven."
"Turns out real soon will be a week on Saturday, Heine, at Evolution."
"Ladies and gentlemen, the next match you will see will be the main event of the evening, pitching King Awesome against the Cosmic Champion, Tommy Gates. Before we go to the ring, Walt Frederick is backstage."
"Thank you, Dorian." Walt is stood, seemingly alone, in a very clean corner of a locker room. Almost like it is a mock-up rather than an actual changing room for wrestlers. "Joining me at this time, the undefeated, new KO champion, Isiah Jones." The camera zooms out to show the girthy Jamaican stood confidently with his belt slung over his left shoulder. "Isiah, congratulations on becoming only the second ever KO champion. What is your reaction to the news that Mad Dog Silva will get a rematch against you at Evolution?"
"Walt, first of all, thank you for your kind words." Isiah's voice is rich and deep. Were he to read a bedtime story, you'd fall in to a peaceful sleep within moments. "As for Mad Dog, well, he's in for another beating next month, just like last-"
From nowhere, Mad Dog Silva enters from screen right, attacking and brutally mauling Isiah Jones, knocking him to the floor and stomping on his head. He is eventually dragged away by security, and Isiah Jones is unmoving on the floor.
"What did we just see, Fantana?" Dorian is in shock.
"I can't condone that, Heine." Fantana shakes his head. "Attacking a man from behind while he is distracted is not something we do here in Cosmic Wrestling."
"With any luck or justice, they'll strip him of his title shot at Evolution."
"Perhaps they should, Heine. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if Jones demands the match take place, after what we just saw. He might want to knock Silva out for good."
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, I can only apologise for the unnecessary level of violence you just saw, and take you instead to what is sure to be an excellent main event."
"Tommy Gates!" Dorian is a fanboy. A middle aged, should-be-professional, fanboy.
"He must be cheating, somehow!" Fantana is incredulous.
"Reaper interferes and hits a Burning Hammer, Gates kicks out. King hits him with The Crown from the second rope, Gates kicks out. King hits the Pumphandle Gourdbuster, Gates kicks out. King hits the Crown, in to the Gourdbuster, Gates kicks out!"
"I don't know how, Heine, but he's cheating somehow."
"I think he's just that damn good. He is the Cosmic Champion, and could be for some time to come. Thank you all for joining us. From myself and Manny Fantana, see you next week!"
Next episode >
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